Marlon King: Officially a Douchebag
Those of you who subjected yourselves to our latest podcast might recall how careful I was to add the word “allegedly” to every phrase when I “relegated” Wigan striker Marlon King for reports that he sexually and physically assaulting a group of women in a bar.
We can now take all of the several dozen “allegedlys” out of that diatribe, as King has been convicted and sentenced to 18 months in prison, as well as being dumped by his club.
And good on him too, considering this:
The court heard that the striker, who was on loan at Hull City at the time, was celebrating his wife’s pregnancy and scoring a winning goal hours earlier, and had been repeatedly “cold-shouldered” by women in the packed Soho Revue Bar in London last December.
When a slightly built university student shunned him, he lost his temper and in an outburst of “completely gratuitous violence” struck out, “smashing” her to the floor. His single clenched-fist blow was so powerful that two other revellers – one of them holding on to his arm – were also sent flying.
(thanks to The Guardian for that report)
What a classy guy that King is.
“What does this have to do with Canadian soccer?” you might ask. Well, maybe the prospect of suiting up alongside this jackass will help convince David Hoilett that he belongs in Canadian kit. Here’s hoping we see junior in the lineup against Macedonia and Poland.
October 29, 2009 at 2:48 pm
Nice work tying it all together, though I can only imagine the Jamaican FA won’t look too kindly upon this either.
October 30, 2009 at 1:10 pm
I don’t know, Squizz. Thanks to the Guardian, again, for this handy little list of things that the Jamaican FA has previously overlooked.
1997: Marlon King convicted of head-butting and punching opposition
player.
1999: Marlon King fined for theft and fraudulently using tax disc.
2002: Marlon King fined for drunk, uninsured driving.
2002: Marlon King secures community order for criminal damage.
Still 2002: Marlon King jailed for receiving a stolen GBP30,000 BMW.
2003: Marlon King fined for chasing two women down Soho street with
belt buckle wrapped around his fist.
2005: Marlon King fined for spitting in the face of woman he’d never
met before.
October 30, 2009 at 1:17 pm
With all this in mind, maybe he should have been officially declared a douchebag years ago.
October 29, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Or it’ll give Jamaica an opening at striker that they’ll look to fill with Hoilett and O’Brian White at the earliest opportunity. As we speak, an oil tanker full of dancing girls with mounds of blow stacked on the deck is on its way to Blackburn.
October 29, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Lord Bob: Clearly considering a future in international diplomacy.
…but that’s a valid point, and one that I was eagerly avoiding in the post itself.